thawts on life.

i feel...

alone.

everything's magic.

quick post;

i’m almost done reading Go Ask Alice, and i don’t think i’m going to finish it. so i have something to look forward to for the next day, next day, etc.

i’m going to start reading Tweak, which is about some meth heads or something.

i should read it inconjunction with the Cocoa book i got.

<3.

mmm.

i need to write more. but now it’s too late, and i need sleep for tomorrow.

i can’t wait for tomorrow… i just hope i get to go to ashland.

p.s. i hope i don’t get caught for stealing from 7/11. it was really stupid, but i was really hungry.

dear diary.

i’m almost done reading ‘Go Ask Alice’, and i’ve almost cried several times. mostly because i can relate and it’s sad.

but i have something to get off my chest, and that no one cares about but me.

i found a girl in portland before i left. she made me want to stay, and she gives me a reason to go back.

but the worst part of it, is i don’t know if she wants me. she wouldn’t give me her number (kind of jokingly, she took her phone out and then we stopped talking about it). then i learned her last name in sign language.

if i really needed to talk to her i could. she told me where she worked, sort of. and she hangs out at the square, so i could just ask one of the people down there to get ahold of her for me.

but what’s the point? that seems a bit stalker-ish. i don’t want to do that to her, if i even have a chance with her.

by far, that was the best day of my life.

we had showed equal feelings for each other the entire night. we missed the last busses and max’s to hangout with one another. and our goodbye was the most romantic in the world.

my new mission is to get a job at Panic, Inc. and get an apartment with my sister and find her again.

Autumn, i hope i get to meet you again. and i hope you never take the bracelet off i gave you.

i’m really missing Portland, and i didn’t want to leave. but i guess my sister’s boyfriend brandon didn’t want me to stay anymore. which is understandable, and i’m ok with it because i needed to officially say goodbye to everyone in medford, work on my resume, and get my macbook back!

although i will miss jason, since he’ll be moving to korea in a week or two. (i wish him luck), and i will roll spliffs and joints in remembrance of him.

berts bee’s + eclipse gum reminds me of autumn. wow, what an amazing kisser. tongue ring? good god.

time to try myspace, smoke, roll, and read more pages in that book.

p.s. i guess there’s more books like the alice one, i need to look into that.

Dating Your Roommate

twentysomethingtales:

So, as I mentioned, I have been on the search for a new roommate for my lovely Gramercy apartment. I posted an ad on Craigslist, which mainly brought out the crazies (read: woman from Italy who spoke little English, man who said he would be happy to contribute his flatscreen t.v. and black leather sofa set - ick!!!!, another male “actor” even though I specified FEMALE only…)

Last night, I showed the place to a totally nice girl, who I think I could definitely live with. I think, think, we hit it off, and our goodbye went something like this:

Me: (Enthusiastically) Okay! So! Yes! Um…you know, if you’re interested, get in touch! You have my e-mail, and phone, and you can Facebook, I am just totally available…

Her: (With smile) Yes, definitely, I’m sure we’ll be in touch, and good luck regardless…NYC housing is just such hell.

So now I feel like I do just after the first date. And because I often throw dating decorum out the window, I often e-mail or text guys the next day: “I had a great time…” This, I’ve learned, is a terrible idea because they never call you back.

She hasn’t e-mailed and I have a worrisome feeling in the pit of my stomach. What if she doesn’t like me? So I’m at a loss for what to do…e-mail her and say that I hope she wants to take the place? Or play it cool…because I gots so many other hawt chickies who want to sleep with me?